and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
