It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
