You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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