the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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