he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
