I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Randomize
