i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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