remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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