I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
