I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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