when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I AM VODKA MAN
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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