her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
