I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I had to cum in my sink.
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