doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
