I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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