If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
