Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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