Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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