We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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