the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize