I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
