dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
