We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize