If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
