i think my mom watched the whole time
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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