Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Randomize
