But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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