I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
