You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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