And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I can't turn off my feet"
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
