I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Houston, we have a squirter
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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