So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
