home. puking in laundry basket.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
where are you?
Hypothermia
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
