I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
