meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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