yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
