Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
