i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
