She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
