hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
