I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Can Purell be used as lube?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
