Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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