...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I would ride that face into the sunset
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
