you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
