so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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