4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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