It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
