she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
