Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
