The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
