I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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